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what exactlly is it

These days I am going through something strange. I suddenly wake up in the middle of the night and think of you and what you will be doing at this hour. I sleep at night thinking of you, hoping that you will be in my dreams. I am talking to myself all my days and nights. I wake up to wish you good morning.
Restless is what I am all through the day, waiting for you to talk to me. And funny is it that I keep fumbling for words when we are talking.
It’s funny to dream of things that are not only difficult to happen but are almost impossible.
I think it is really difficult to sit with a lot on your mind and your heart thumping hard and still not able to tell you how much I missed you all this time when I was alone and how much I love you and care for you.
I am going through a purple patch of my life and I cant thank you for this, may be I never will but I wish someday, I tell you and hope that you will too feel the same.
I am a stranger to this world. This world of love.
The past was terribly wrong. I never felt this for you even if you think otherwise.
It was a whole world of mistakes that I created. They always say your first impression is the last one. I messed it up. Damn!! I was such a fool.
I may never explain you why I did that may be silliness have no explanations, but I want to tell you this. If I could for once control time I would like to clear that patch of my life from time and from your life too.
I never felt how silly I am when I said you all that which I never meant. I hurted you a lot but they were not all my fault. May be time was not right or may be fate was not with me.
But it still is a hundred miles away from me.
Loosing you made me realise how much I missed you. And it has taught me a lot. I have realised what those words mean to people who are in love and I realised it with a first hand experience.
But life is all about rights and wrongs. I was on the wrong path but now I am on the right way. Life has never been easy to me and I never complained about it. But this time with you, I wish it was. I am whatever it’s all because of you. It’s for the first time that I am not afraid of the reciprocations of my action. Love has made me a daredevil.
I am ready to risk all for you.

All my loss and gains will be because of you. I am not blaming you. I just can’t do. When I loved you I never took a promise from my heart that you will be mine for sure, but I just started caring for you. The care is now more than its meaning and its time for me to adjudge it to be love of my life, you.

You have every reason to be angry with me. But for once I wish I was able to explain you how much I love you and how much you mean to me. May be words are not enough for me and they never will be. But like it is said words are all I have to take your heart away.
I have a very bad impression as a person on you. It’s my entire mistake. But I want you to forget that and just be able to realize that how much love has changed me and how much is it because of you. Please be with me.

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RATAN TATA

RATAN TATA: MY IDOL

 

Since childhood all of us have been in one way or the other using the TATA product in our daily lives.

 

Since the very beginning of the TATA Group, they have been working silently in their Jamshedpur plants, working on a national pride –The TAJ HOTEL’S, pioneering the aviation in India, constructing first Power plant and have many more first’s to there name.

 

Since 1991, Mr. Ratan Tata has been inspirational in taking our country to the next level, be it making the first Indian car or buying big MNC’S marking the arrival of the INDIA story to the world. 

He is the part of every story India ever produced.

I am greatly inspired by not only Mr. Ratan Tata but also from his ancestors.

Working in this competitive world and still being so much human is an art which Mr. Tata has mastered. Making a car for just Rs. 1 lack is not just an achievement but an innovation. His philosophy of working for the people is paying rich dividends to the middle and lower middle class of the country.

I still remember a famous interview on BBC, just after TATA Steel bought CORUS Steel. When asked about the fact that CORUS was over-employed and weather their would be any job-cuts, he politely answered

“There are two ways of seeing water in a glass ,I watch it the other way.” He said “ instead of cutting jobs to keep cost under control we are looking at increasing the production.”

 

NANO CAR, the  very idea of creating a car with a price tag of Rs.1lack was challenged, but he had faith in the very much Indian TATA Motor’s engineers. While launching the car this year, he said that he was worried of the family which moves around the city on a scooter with four people riding on it, in a rainy summer afternoon. He was talking about 60% of the Indian population. The car is a gift to all these people.

I am greatly inspired by an industrialist who runs his companies like a public limited, with almost all the efforts going to public service.

The very fact of  company which once financed the “British Govt. of India” being bought by one of the companies of India still leaves goose- bumps to me and to a large population of the country and the world.

He not only made the dream possible but also made us proud by winning it style in a bidding war, letting the world respect the economic might and confidence of the Indian Economy.

 

This 70 year old gem of the modern era still lives a life of simple living and high thinking.

Despite his wealth, Tata always keeps a low profile. During his stint in the US, Tata had no qualms in doing odd jobs, he even washed dishes!

 

I am greatly inspired by his modern approach of running the largest industrial house in India and his traditional ways of serving to the society.

The most inspiring quote which makes me idolize him was published in Business Week magazine in mid April.2008.

He said that every day before going to bed he thinks about the whole day and the activities he did which served the society in the best possible way and was able to provide food to at least one family.

I also desire to be like him and serve the country. He has really inspired me in shaping up my future and my ambitions in life. I, like him, wish to be able to play a small role in providing employment to people. I too want to be part of a revolution which will take India to a developed country. I wish one day people recognize me like they recognize him and also to meet him in my own capacity

TWILIGHT

Twilight

 

Well I have seen this movie for a zillion times already before writing anything about it and I know its too late for you guys to be even interested in reading anything about this movie. Still I want to share something with you all

 

I first came to know about this movie thought the internet-god-bless the Internet. And true to each word said about it, it’s just a fantastic movie to watch. The story of a vampire falling in love with his food, a girl ready to change herself for her lover, a special family trying hard to live a normal life, a small town mystery, I mean it has just about everything that keeps you fascinated. The love and its intensity they both share is too truly and freshly told that you never complaint about the weird subject of the movie. The role played by Kristen and Robert is fantastic.

 

For Kristen I have only one word-wow. Man, she is too hot and at the same time way to talented and I just love her. She is on my facebook page too and damn! I am too happy.

 

For Robert, I can be sure that he is already a hot property in Hollywood and his hairstyle in the movie is what I want for me too.

 

The direction is awesome and the small town looks so real. The music of the movie is different and is surely a high selling one. The song “Eyes on Fire” is personally my favorite from the movie.

 

The sequel is coming this year and I can’t wait for it. I am a fan in simple words.

 

There is a quote I believe in

“ If you love someone, set them free. If they comes back than it is yours but if it doesn’t than it was never yours”.

I strictly believe in it but with a small modification that goes around, as even if it is not yours, you should still love them, care for them the same way as you have done before they knew about your feelings or even before you knew about it.

 

I believe that love happens in the most tragic and unavoidable circumstances.

Well, actually it happens when you think that even friendship with such person is not going to work.

But wow!! It’s the beauty of love that it surprises you more than you think. Love will blossom in fights. The more you fight, the more you love. This is amazing and it truly makes our life worth every second.

 

I never thought you will be someone that you are today to me. I never felt like this ever. And all love without even having seen you. It’s amazing how people do this. Living a life only for love and its amazing I am too doing it and with amusement. I don’t even know you and well to be true I don’t even want to till I know that you will complete me. There are days when I wait for you and there are nights when I dream about you but one thing is sure…you always make me smile whenever I think about you.

“I saw your picture on the computer,

Oh! You are so beautiful.

Couldn’t resist but said “love you”

The madness added when the picture said it too”

 

Even with all this happiness, deep down inside I know its not going to work this way. I have been ready for tears in the days coming by. I have to be prepared for the worst-case scenario and that is the time when you will say,  “move on without me”. And that time is what I don’t want to ever face but I do believe that destiny is something that is written and its something you have to be ready for. So preparing my self for this I have started to love you even more.

But there does come a time when I feel bad thinking about it, but a little thought of life if I can live with you makes all my doubt fade away.

There is a silly feeling in my heart. It’s a gut feeling or whatever they say it. I feel that each day when I feel or start to believe on letting you go out of my life something happens that makes me believe again that you are for me and only for me and I can make this little possibility come true if you help me out. But then again if it’s love then you too know it and you.

There is small quote from the alchemist:

“If you love and want something in your life truly and this whole world will conspire to make sure you achieve it”

 

I think this is my destiny.

You are my destiny.

I just hope I too am your’s.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

I too had a love story

woow!.. So i am going to share with you a very spl story. A love story but its not mine actually but it’s of a buddy named Ravin, and i red about it thriugh his book which happens to be titled as “I TOO HAD A LOVE STORY” and bot did i liked it..well i just loved it. It’s so much real and so much heart felting that you just keep on compaing there love with any classic modern day love story. It’s written in such a simple yet so powerfull way that you realise in just one go how much love do the couple share and how true are they with eachother.

You love them when they talk to eachother on there oh so cute phone chat’s, you happen to feel the pain when ravin makes khusi cry.ya the girl’s name is khusi…woow..woow!! na. The story was folding up very nicely,meetingfor the first time, first kiss, a fantasy ceramony and then it all crashed just two days ahead of the d-day. It left me in great pain when i realised how cruel was destiny on Ravin,who got the sweetest girl in his life to find the greatest gift of god only to loose it one day in a way that he will never evr frgt. Khusi died in an accident and it all just happend in a 4 months. Well fate has its own ways.

But this one is to my buddy….i know you not reading this but bro i am really sorry for you and really sad that we don’t have such a beautiful girl in this world any more but i know the angel is around you and always protecting you. Not everyone gets to have a love story like you had and not everyone had the guts to tell it to the world.

I truely feel my greatest wishes for the family of your beloved khusi and to you and your family. I hope one day you come out of this pain though i know you might have already.It’ll never  be easy to forget that angel and i wish that angel bestowes all her care on you.

GOD BLESS YOU ALL!!…

My dear sister

My sis, well i share a strange equation with her. We are almost always fighting.

I am persuing ma bachelors from another city so i live there.

She is still studing in school and stays with family.

Whenever i am at home, the only thing we are doing is fighting over almost everything. Be it on food, watching tv,listening to music. Its weird to imagine even a single hour that we both don’t fight. Even ehile i am writing the blog we are not on talkin g terms coz of a fight on break fast this morning. she said she will not serve me food so we had a fight and now we are not talking.hahaha….funny it is. But deep in my heart i have lots of love and respect for my sweet sis. She is truely an awsome sis. She is just so special to my family. Super intelligent. Not even once in her life she was not among the best in class with very high marks. Superbly talented, she is a very good painter,singer and effective speaker.  She is always happy for what she has and never askes for anything. I eman she hardly spends  Rs. 10 each day. Will never ask for anything. I really feel funny when i think about this knowing what i end up spending in one day.

Now the strange part. whenevr i am not at home, that is when i am at my college we are best of friends, we will talk a lot on everything from studies to movies to what i did. She is always helping me out in my college projects and stuff.

Its funny when i realise she is the same person i fight all day all the time. So here is something for my sister….

Dear sis, i really am lucky to have you as my sister and i love you so much and i miss you evertime i am not with you all. You have been so special to us all and i really hope you achive all that you want to.

I might not be able to say it too often but you know how much i care for you and how much i love you. So be the same sweet angel you are  because i love fighting with angels.

Year gone by

Since child hood we all have been doing the same mistake, well, atkeast i am. Making fake promises to myself about what i plan to do the coming year ans i sincerely think evryone does the same. It’s not bad but one should try to stick to them and atleast try to full-fill one of them. Each year i take these so very silly and unjust resolutions for the coming year. Never in my life i have actully ended up in abiding by them but exactly opposite to them. But this time its going to be different. This time i have a special “Resolution”. Its a little funny but it is my resolution for the coming year and many years to come.

Here it is…..I am saying goodbye to RESOLUTION’s from this year.

Well its not actully as bad as it seems to me. But i am sick and tired of this yaar. Every year you come up with the most innovative resolution for yourself and you never do what you have promised to your ownself all year.

Last year was no diffrent. I had done loads of promises to myself and to the world but the only time i remember them was when i was going to bed last night.  That time i was just thinkin of the past one year and what i lost and won, i have realised that the past year was the worst of my life. I lost some of the most precious things i had. I am a complete change and a far cry from the me i was last year. But it all happens for the sake of change. And when time is not on your side you are a complete looser.

This has been my story for the past one year or may be more than that. i have been to the lows and to further lows all the past year. Its not just about me but it is almost everything closer to me, anything i like, anything i want to have.

Weather its the mess at my fav. football club Chelsea or it be the Sourav Gangully era or it be my personal life story. Its been a complete dumb year of mine. But as it is said hope carry’s you forward, so i am ready to welcome the year with open arms, with dreams in my eyes and happiness on my mind.

So what are my plans for the 2009 year. Well they are many but i don’t think i am going to share them with anyone. But one thing is for sure, they are not resolutions, they are more of a code to live in peace with myself rather than what i have to achieve and what not to do. So as the new year is begining i am a kind of happy and nervous but i believe i am going to end the 009 year on a high and will be able to be what i wish to.

SO here’s i am wishing each and everyone in this whole world a very HAPPY & FUNFILLED NEW YEAR.

chelsea

Everytime the transfer window opens up there is always a huge buzz about what chelsea is going to buy and at what price. But this time it is a little diffrent. Roman is in huge money problem as reported by the media. But i doubt it. His commitment to the club is of no doubt. And he will not stop the BIG PHILL from buying out quality players.

So what are they really going to buy. Well; as a fan,i have some thing to say here.

We at chelsea are spoilt of choices but we are becoming a bit predictable. I really think we need a large scale change. We should sell players also instead of only buying out players. Selling bridge,malouda,monerio,alex or balletti is never going to cause a major problem and in a way its goin to help the young talent in getting prepared for the future.

Besides i strongly believe that having so many good mid-filders is not going to be easy in this situation. Selling a player from that group and adding a acadamy player can help the future. As far as wingers and strikers are concerned we should look forward to adding a quality player like podolski or villa and transferring moluda. besides we will also be able to get away with anelka come next season. He surely can rake some moolah for the club. Time will never be the same. So lets hope the great russian Roman empire is out of the gloom and we are again in the market for some big money transfers.

Chelsea is for life. I mean i can never imagine life with out watching Terry saving and Lamps or Deco creating magic in the mid-field or watching the big Drog scoring at will. It was so magical when MOURINHO ruled the Stanford Bridge Arena. Its so good to see MAN Utd. , Arsenal, Liverpool,Barca finding it difficult to score or even draw the games. I want that era to be back and i want it to be back with Big Phill still around the club.

Chelsea has always been a dream for me and it will always be one watching a game at the club stadium.

 

Blue was every where. Blue is everywhere. Blue will be everywhere.

All Hail The Great Chelsea!!

my dream

Everyone of us dream. But this is a dream different form others. It’s a dream I am dreaming for last month or so. I am dreaming of being with you. I am dreaming of your presence al around me.

It’s silly and so is me. Whatever I am doing is just for you.

And damn I am so happy. I am all smiles day in day out.

Laughing at difficulties and facing challenges. It seems I am never alone. Every time I am idle I am with you, thinking of you, talking to you, praying for you.

Wow!!

Its love finally and girl I am loving every moment of it.!!

I don’t want this to end ever. I just want to live in this dream all my life. I never felt so much enjoying ever. I am feeling the freshness of air, the fragrance of  flowers, the sound of water flowing from air. I am loving the moon light and sun seems to be smiling all the time. The rains are fun and evening are pleasant then ever.

You are making all this possible and without even knowing.

You have completely changed me. You have made me a better person.

I know I was never a person you would like to spend your time with but that doesn’t stop me from loving you, in-fact more. I never ever felt this strong for any girl I met. It seems all my life I was a nomad living on the directions of the sand. Suddenly, you came there and showed me the crystals around me.

You have made me a poet and you are my inspiration and you are my poem.

 

I may never be able to tell you all this.

I am never be able to explain the reasons.

But I want to.

But you have taken my words from me and I am now searching for words.

I do not want to hurt you ever so may never be able to tell you how much I love you.

 

 

The past was never what I wanted to. It was full of mistakes and silly fate of mine. All this has led me top a place when it is difficult for me to be back with you but  some day I would tell you how much you mean to me and how important  your presence is for me.!!

 

Forgive me if you can. I want to begin it afresh with no past.

 

please come back to me and please be the precious gift i want for my life.

i m tryin to be the person yu luve coz…………
yu r the reason……fr mi to change
yu r the reason ……fr mi to live
yu r the reason ……fr mi to breath
yu r the reason ……fr mi to try
yu r the reason ……fr mi to laugh
yu r the reason ……fr mi to dream
yu r the reason ……fr mi to love
yu r the reason ……fr mi to cry
yu r the reason ……fr mi to hope
yu r the reason ……fr mi to wish
yu r the reason ……fr mi to wait
yu r the reason ……fr mi to listen
yu r the reason ……fr mi to speak

n now i only wish yu know this that i live a life of somone who was waitin to die and yu have changed it all…..a little smile on yur face makes my day and a little drop of tear breaks me apart.

i never thout of yu as i think for yu know……i am spending days thinking about yu
…..i am dreamin of yu all my nyts……moon is fascinates mi……..pain leaves a smile on my face…

a litle thought of yu turns pain into unending joys…
it seems all my life i wz dead until yu came to me

if yu r a dream i want to sleep all my life
untill yu come n wake me up,
to take me to a world of uknown,
where i spend my days watching yu

wish yu know this
n wish yu feel the same fr mi
i wish an i live coz this is the only thing left in me nw……..

n i wish yu know dis…
n i wish yu trust mi on dis..
wish ol dose past memories r erased fr evr…

I wish fr a nw beginin wre ma days r with yu
n nyts in yur dreams…

wishin of yu!!……………….
….

♥♥♥♥ ♥♥♥ ♥♥ ♥

♥♥♥yu own ma lyf knw♥♥♥